When I started Success Unwrapped two years ago, and Internet Marketing Unwrapped over a year ago, I was working full time as an Account Rep for Nokia… the cell phone company.

Yes, I still get calls now and then from store managers, which reminds me of my “old life” that I have completely left behind. I didn’t give it a lot of thought when it was small stores that don’t sell a lot of phones, but yesterday I got a call from the Bell World store in the Toronto Eaton Centre — probably the biggest account Nokia has — and the manager said they had not seen a new rep in the 10 months since I was laid off.

Hmm… not what I would call good customer service. But I digress!

So anyhow, in the old days when I had the corporate gig, I would work all day, then come home and track down personal development and internet marketing experts, ask for interviews — and then ask some more, since you never get them all to say yes — lock down the dates, ask for bonuses to if it was a live call, then send out emails about the calls, or the podcasts, review some affiliate programs, send out more emails… yes, all around working a full time job AND some other extracurricular work as well.

Then in January I got laid off, after 3 years… the whole story is here.

At that moment, I realized I had become a full-time online marketer myself… but I had been afraid to quit the JOB, just like a lot of us are. We get hooked on that false sense of security that really isn’t so secure after all (I’m a perfect example of that!)

But I had learned the concept of “acting as if” — also known as “fake it till you make it” — a little trick that has served me well over time.

I can think of numerous times in my life when this has taken me to the next level:

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Yesterday I had my first facial at a spa. Yes, I went to a spa in Las Vegas, and got a massage… but I’ve never had a professional treatment put on my face.

It was part of the birthday present that Barry got me… a gift certificate to the new Spa at Club Northwest, the gym that we go to. And the certificate is good for several treatments. Guys, if you want a gift that will make your woman think very highly of you, a gift certificate to a spa is a great choice!

Spa = The epitome of blissfulness.

Gift Certificate = She will think of you while she’s being pampered… and her thoughts will be around gratitude, appreciation and love (and she gets to choose her own treatments — even better!)

This spa had a different vibe than in Vegas. Everything in Vegas seems very mechanical, with a certain money-focused get-em-in and get-em-out machinery in place. The one in Grants Pass is more spiritual in feel, which generates more of a relaxing feeling… and that’s really the point, right?

To start off with, they offered a selection of drinks, including some local Southern Oregon wines. I chose a Cabernet Sauvignon, which to me helped me get into the mindset of being pampered, which in turn kicked the gratitude into place. After all, how often do you enjoy and savor a nice glass of wine in the middle of the afternoon? (Not something I advocate on a regular basis, but for a special occasion — or to make yourself feel deserving while you “act as if” — it can be highly effective.)

And then, the real pampering began…

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Last night I went to Donna Schmid’s local meditation group… she’s the one that gave me both my first Swedish massage, and my Shamanic healing.

For the weekly group meeting though, it’s usually about 10-15 people who sit in a circle, share experiences, and connect with their souls.

Barry wanted me to experience the group alone this time, so I went by myself. I’ve been feeling a bit drained, both physically and emotionally, lately… but I left with more energy, more inspiration, and more enlightenment than I had thought possible.

To start off the session, we passed around a deck of “oracle cards”, and Donna chose one card that would be the topic for the night.

The card she picked was called “Mercy” and it talked about being merciful and compassionate to others, rather than being judgmental.

The card really resonated with her, and she felt it must be her personal card, meant as a personal lesson for her. She told a story about how she had judged someone unfairly the week before, then said we’d pick a new card for the group.

But two of us asked her why she was so sure that nobody else resonated with the concept of mercy? What if there were others who had had similar experiences?

And it turned out that we had — we all had.

So then began the process of uncovering what the topic had to teach us, and what we were going to do to solve it…

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Yesterday Barry and I went to Ashland for a craft fair, did some Christmas shopping, then headed up to Medford.

In Medford, we spent an hour or two getting lost in the Barnes & Noble bookstore… where he instantly manifested several types of books he was looking for.

The first one was a book that had a similar format to another he had wanted to find, that was to serve as inspiration for the formatting of my upcoming Success Unwrapped book. And even though he had never seen or heard of this book he picked up, it was exactly what we needed — and it only took a few minutes to find it.

Then he wanted a research book that was newer and went deeper than the one he had already picked up, on a topic we’re going to write about… and moments after putting the first one back on the shelf, he found it.

But his manifesting abilities were not perfect… we had a bet over the color of a new cat bed we picked up, and whether it was the same color as the one we had. He said yes, and if he was right, I would have had to do five nights of both cooking and cleaning.

I said no — the old one was slightly greener than the new one — and if I was right, he would have to give me five nights of massages.

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All my life I’ve been celebrating Thanksgiving about six weeks before my birthday, and Christmas about six weeks after my birthday.

That’s because in Canada, Thanksgiving is the second Monday in October. Everyone wonders why, but it’s pretty simple… the crops need to be harvested sooner up north, and since Thanksgiving was created to give thanks for the harvests, Canadian Thanksgiving was earlier.

Having said that, it’s worth pointing out that in Southern Oregon… just about an hour north of the California border… I’m actually on a higher latitude than I was in Toronto, Canada. But still, the weather here is warmer… go figure.

Anyhow, I just shared a video and a powerful exercise over on the LWL Worldwide blog that shows you why gratitude is so important to manifesting what you want… so I’d like to invite you to check it out. The post is called “Giving Thanks and Getting Desires”

But while you’re here, I’d like to share another video with you here. I thought it was going to be religious-focused because it’s done by a monk, but it’s really just inspirational about being grateful for the little things:

Speaking of the little things, Barry just sent me a chat that said:

look forward to watching the movie, tonight, with you – grateful for times like dat

And I’m very grateful, not only for the times we spend together, enjoying each other’s company, but for the little notes like that. They make my heart skip a beat, and realize how lucky I am to have found someone special like him.

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Writing about carrot juice yesterday reminded me of an email that was circulating the web a year or two ago. I happened to keep it, and posted it in my old Success Unwrapped membership area, so I found it again to share here:

ARE YOU A CARROT, AN EGG, OR A COFFEE BEAN?

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil.

In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil, without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.

Turning to her daughter, she asked, “Tell me what you see.”

“Carrots, eggs, and coffee,” she replied.

Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.

The daughter then asked, “What does it mean, mother?”

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity — boiling water. Each reacted differently.

The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak.

The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened.

The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

“Which are you?” she asked her daughter.

“When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?”

Think of this: Which am I?

Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you.

When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate yourself to another level? How do you handle adversity?

Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human and enough hope to make you happy.

The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can’t go forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you was smiling.

Live your life so at the end, you’re the one who is smiling and everyone around you is crying.

You might want to send this message to those people who mean something to you; to those who have touched your life in one way or another; to those who make you smile when you really need it; to those who make you see the brighter side of things when you are really down; to those whose friendship you appreciate; to those who are so meaningful in your life.

May we all be COFFEE!!

The power to change the world we live in — to change our environments, in essence — truly lies within ourselves.

What’s the best way to “be” coffee?

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Last night I was making carrot juice, and I poured some of the pulp down the sink, into the built-in garbage disposal. It seemed to work fine, but then I looked in the sink to see a mess of spewed carrot bits and egg shells, smelling pretty raunchy. It made me think immediately that the sink was sick, and I tried to remedy the situation, but the mess kept coming back up into the second sink… then back to the first one.

I asked Barry to help me out, and he was able to stop the suction effect by removing some pots from the second sink. The way they had been covering the hole, they kept the suction going and wouldn’t let the mess go down the drain.

“It’s okay,” he joked. “The sickness is gone.”

Now that the thoughts of doing irreparable damage to our sink and having to call plumbers had vanished, I was immediately swept with emotions, and said, “I’m sorry for making the sink puke. I didn’t mean to hurt it!”

Then I laughed at how I had personified the sink, and it suddenly reminded me of an old commercial I used to see on TV a lot. I told Barry about the Ikea commercial, which was apparently created by Spike Jonze, and how it used to effect me emotionally:

But it wasn’t just me. All the girls I knew felt sorry for this little lamp when watching the commercial…. then we’d laugh when the host said, “that’s because you’re crazy!”

But deep down we knew we weren’t crazy. We had been affected by the same tools movie makers use when hooking you into a story: the music, the pacing, the positioning of the “victim”, and the back-and-forth points of view.

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Today is my birthday.

The first birthday I’ve ever spent in the U.S.

The first birthday I’ve had with Barry as my partner… and that perk came complete with a full weekend of celebration, a nice dinner, some wine, and several beautiful presents that I’m very grateful for.

And yes, I’ve been loving every minute of it.

I remember a few years ago, a co-worker of mine who turned 25 said something to the effect of, “When you get to be my age, you don’t count the birthdays anymore.” And of course he was more than 10 years younger than me when he said it.

Not only that, but I had asked him if he was going to use a “personal day” (days off that we had to use or else lose) for his birthday, and he knew that I had done that on mine… so his answer didn’t make sense, because if I was still celebrating birthdays at my age, why shouldn’t he be at his?

Well, it’s mostly about the mindset.

I find a lot of people put a big weight on their age, and they allow the numbers to affect how they feel.

For me, I focus on how I feel first.

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Barry just shared this Native American parable with me, and I absolutely love it:

The Creator gathers all the animals and says, “I want to hide something from humans until they are ready for it — the realization that they create their own reality.”

“Give it to me. I’ll fly it to the Moon,” says the Eagle.

“No, one day soon they will go there and find it.”

“How about the bottom of the ocean?” ask the salmon.

“No, they will find it there too.”

“I will bury it in the great plains,” says the Buffalo.

“They will soon dig and find it there.”

“Put it inside them,” says the wise grandmother mole.

“Done,” says the Creator. “It is the last place they will look.”

Okay, so now that you know where to look… I’d like to share a great way to find it.

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I’m eating a sugar-free Twizzlers strawberry twist right now… the same brand of red licorice that used to be my absolute favorite when I was a kid.

I had to buy the package — in fact, I had to buy TWO packages — because it instantly manifested in front of my eyes.

Now in case you’re thinking, “poof, there it is!” when I talk about instant manifestation happening right before my eyes… that’s not how it works, and that’s not what happened.

It’s magical, but it’s not magic.

Editor’s Note — Added After Publication: In a humorously synchronistic event that completely jives with the vibe of this post, Barry was just reading this and said, “Hey, didn’t you know that 2 1/2 years ago, I ended my Manifesting Mindset e-book with a similar phrase?”

No, I didn’t know that… but what he wrote was “It’s Not Magic… But It Can Be Magical!”

When you see a magician make something appear before your eyes, it really didn’t. It just looks like it did, through an illusion. That “illusion” (and some illusions are more illusionary than others) is what we call magic.

But when you manifest something, and suddenly it’s in front of you, it’s not quite an illusion… except for the fact that, on a quantum physics level, all of reality is an illusion. But the thing you’re manifesting is as real as our reality allows it to be, hence the word “manifest”. It’s just that the experience, the way that real thing becomes part of your reality, is magical.

I know, it might seem like I’m talking in circles, or not making sense… or even a little loopy. Okay, so let me clarify.

Here’s the story of how it went down…

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